Once I had a love and it was divine

Uh so HEY this is sort of a general disclaimer! The last few days have been a horrific clusterfuck of different types of bad things happen alternating with things that are incredibly stressful and that's not going to let up until at leaaaaaast Monday night. This isn't a hiatus notice so much as a "I was already a slow threader and now it's going to be at a snail's pace for a while so if I go a day without doing anything that's why" general disclaimer. Sorry in advance and retroactively because, well, it's been like this full-on for the last couple days.

This affects Roxie Richter and Amy Santiago.

[ah, the joys of nature at night! The still beauty of being in the middle of the woods, hearing nothing but soothing nature sounds. The wind blowing in the trees, the crickets chirping in the distance, the...]

-- fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck, could that have gone any worse?! God!

[... half-ninja screaming bloody murder after an unbelievably confusing, frustrating, very bad no-good evening as judged by her currently warped standards. It can't all be atmospheric.]

Calling a not-hiatus from tonight to mid-Monday because I am traveling to Pennsylvania for a weekend of hanging out with internet friends and watching pro wrestling and whatnot! I will be threading when I can because I am super-excited for this event, but it will probably mostly be when I'm at the hotel. Rock.

ASK A QUESTION, it can be anything CFUD related. OOC, IC, relationship/first impressions, psychology, thoughts, whatever. I.E. My character's opinion of your character (relationships and whatnot) or maybe what you have been wondering about this behavior or that, or general thoughts on my characters or canons, Hot or Not, You Should Jump Me, App My Canon, whatever you want to ask for. WHEN I REPLY, I will also ask you a question in turn! (If I remember to ask you one!)

I play Roxie Richter and Ty Lee. Let's do this thing! Help me get through work today!

So Roxie hit 4,000 comments sometime within the last couple weeks (which is I think the fastest any of my characters have gotten there aside from Kodachi and Ty Lee)! And... well, I played my other two in the last calendar week! Clearly this calls for the question meme.

ASK A QUESTION, it can be anything CFUD related. OOC, IC, relationship/first impressions, psychology, thoughts, whatever. I.E. My character's opinion of your character (relationships and whatnot) or maybe what you have been wondering about this behavior or that, or general thoughts on my characters or canons, Hot or Not, You Should Jump Me, App My Canon, whatever you want to ask for. WHEN I REPLY, I will also ask you a question in turn!

I'm going to be bored at work today, let's do a thing :|b

OKAY SO Roxie's counselees (Ash, Amano, John Egbert, Tsukihiko)! First of all I'm so sorry, the odds of Roxie being useful and helpful are so slim. It will be an adventure in bad counseling. Aaaanyway I'm PST, usually free from the mid to late afternoon onwards, and I am going to try to be in IRC more than I've been for the last couple months so I'm more acccessible than... well, usually.

ALSO I am probably going to be posting this week, sometime in the evening! Not sure which day yet but that is totally a thing. Anyway feel free to use this post for planning/schedules/etc.!

God, this is idiotic.

Okay so since I think I've failed to comment to every mistletoe this month barring the very first one let's play it safe and do The Latest Mistletoe Journal Post Ever for Kodachi Kuno, Ty Lee, and Roxie Richter for... like maybe the one or two people who have any interest in that :|b

Specify who you want in the subject title unless it's like super-obvious (hi Ramona).

( Flickr meme )

ALSO to any/everyone I flaked out on for counseling stuff (which is... a lot!), I am so sorry for... well basically for being a flake (it's my natural state of being). If anyone who had Roxie as a counselor or Kodachi or Ty Lee as a counselee either wanted to get a thread in or a follow-up thread in (hi Sakura hi), hit me up here and we can totally work something out.

Character: Roxanne "Roxie” Richter
Series: Scott Pilgrim
Age: early ‘20s
Job: Relationship Therapist
Canon: This is the tale of an irresponsible twentysomething named Scott Pilgrim, who is forced to clean up his act and start acting his age in order to win the heart of Ramona Flowers, the girl of his dreams. He faces obstacles like getting a job, accepting the consequences of his own actions, and oh, right, defeating seven superpowered Evil Exes who have formed an honest-to-goodness League dedicated to making sure nobody dates said girl, under penalty of death. Yeah. That complicates matters a bit.

Amazingly, "I dated a girl in college and she dumped me so she can never love anyone ever again OR I’LL KILL THEM” is just a taste of the chip on her shoulder that Roxie Richter, the 4th Evil Ex, possesses. A half-ninja with all the speed, stealth, and skills with a sword the title implies, Roxie is a tightly-wound ball of issues who is prone to getting angry and defensive about topics including but not limited to her abilities, being called an "evil ex-boyfriend,” and, of course, the nature of her failed relationship with Ramona. Despite all evidence to the contrary, Roxie really does think that she’s the one who's doing the right thing (and has the conspiracy theories to prove it), but really she’s just a girl with a katana, a poorly-disguised inferiority complex, and a whole lot of anger issues to work through.

Also, she really, really sucks at coming up with insults and/or competent threats. This doesn’t stop her from trying (or trying to act like they never happened after they inevitably fail to land).

Sample Post: "Hello, campers! My name’s Roxanne and from now on, I’m your go-to guy for any and all problems with that special someone or something you’re head-over-heels in love with. When it comes to what to do or what not to do in relationships, I’m pretty much an expert, so feel free to ask me about..."

Are you kidding me? "Anything you might ‘be-curious’ about?” Wow, that’s just hilarious. First of all, I’m not a guy, thanks. And second, if this prepared statement is just going to turn into bad sexuality puns designed to piss me off then I’m not reading any more of it! You think I don’t see that you put the word "experimenting” down here in slightly bigger font? I see the bigger font! And don’t think I didn’t notice that I’m not even delivering this to actual campers, either! Nice try, Director, but when half of the class eats the introduction forms I had to pass out I sort of got the hint that this is just one big joke at my expense. Believe me, if I didn’t have college loans and property damage bills to pay off I wouldn’t even be here right now.

... okay, fine. I’ll listen to all of your stupid problems and then I’ll say "wow, that’s awful, but consider this a new beginning” or something equally lame if you're that desperate, but let me just save you all some time; don’t bother, it won’t work out. You’ll give your heart to them and they’ll kinda love you back, but then they’ll start acting distant and talking to a bunch of guys who clearly only want to sleep with them, and soon you’ve put half of the campus football team in the hospital and suddenly she -- they act like you’re out of line! So they dump you for loving them too much, and just to add insult to injury they give you back the mixtape you spent eight hours making for them! So give it up. Nobody loves you, nobody believes in you, it’s just you, your mixtape, and a carton of French Vanilla. Forever.

Oh, did I hit a nerve? Obviously I'm the bad guy for telling you the truth, right? Well, bring it on! This katana isn't just for show, y’know, and if you creeps can't keep your hands to yourselves then I'm gonna take your hands for myself!

... oh, stop groaning, dammit, forget I even said that, okay? And don't even think about begging me to stop, either, because I don't have to put on the red light.

((Voting went here. 93.7%, what the hell.))